Today has been a little bit better. I've found that I like my haircut when I'm wearing a hat - thankfully when a thick piece of material covers 90% of my head it's not so bad. Yay for focusing on the positives! Never mind that it's almost summer and wearing a winter hat may not be socially acceptable (or climate-ly responsible). I may be a sweat ball salad, but at least I'll look cute, right? Right?
I have been really surprised by some rude comments I've gotten today about my hair. I guess surprised isn't the word - after working in the hospitality field, people don't really surprise me anymore. I'm more confused. Earlier someone saw my haircut and said "Oh my gosh, I don't know how you stand short hair! I would absolutely HATE it!" When I told this person that I had to cut it because I will be starting chemo soon, she replied "Well, if I had cancer I would get a wig. There's no way I could look like that." Why would anyone think that would be kind or good? I think people are just blissfully selfish and don't think how their words affect others. It blows my mind. Thankfully I'm less fragile today and it simply amuses me as a shocking example of how ridiculous people are.
Today was my last day of radiation. It was easy, just as the other treatments have been, but as I left I had to stop and pick up some paperwork from the nurse's station before I left. They printed off this certificate that says I've earned the Purple Heart Award for making it through radiation. It was an incredibly silly piece of paper, but I felt like it might mean something to someone who really struggled through their treatments. I was insanely undeserving because I skipped lightly through radiation, simply showing up and quickly feeling better. The first big cancer chapter is closed, only to be quickly followed by the next big cancer chapter - chemo. Not that it's on my mind at all… Super excited to peel off my leg stickers tonight!
During my 10 hour shifts the past few days I have been reading my mom's book! If you didn't know, my mom is an incredibly interesting person and taught middle school English for 30 some years. She has always wanted to write a book and now, after years of laboring, she has produced one! It is still in it's very first draft and I am lucky enough to get to take a peek. I will tell you all how wonderful it is later because right now I have to get back to reading it!
I can not believe how rude people are. and hurtful when doing so. You are right though, people are crazy and can be so blissfully self-absorbed.
ReplyDeletei think for some, it's weakness and it's the only way they can survive life. that or they are mentally missing something. buuuutt that's just what i think.
You have earned your Purple heart, rePreSent! Don't down play that! Hopefully chemo goes just as easily for you as radiation did!
Strong woman.
love you sister!
Naomi,
ReplyDeleteI'm so glad the first phase of the total cure is over!
Don't even give the "downer" person a second thought, it seems that person has more than hair to grow. :o]
Have a wonderful vacation with your hot husband. You deserve it. I love you.
I will pray for that poor soul that does not have any empathy or common sense. You know, if you google "summer hats for women" there are some fabulous options. Goodbye stickers!
ReplyDeleteBy the way, I love that in your posts you always include something else that is going on in your life that is not cancer-related. It's such a meaningful addition, and a reminder to me (and probably others) that life continues regardless of this illness. Cancer is this big scary thing, and of course I check this blog to see how you are feeling and what you are battling. But I also believe in my heart that God can and will heal you of this cancer, and you are already triumphing over it when you keep living your life.
I also said you were stronger than I am. I never meant to hurt you or put you down in any way. You are a stronger person than I am. You still try to work and get out and socialize. I repect that. You inspire those around you, including me. My only redeeming feature is my hair. I would have a seriously, seriously hard time not having my hair. Maybe I'm petty, but I absolutely hate everything else about me. My hair is the only thing I think I have going for me. I continue to pray for you and have requested prayer for you.
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